Best: Break-up “Things”

I had it in my head to list my favorite “Things” of 2007 which was going to include books and music and various media [probably Jezebel.com would be on that list, and maybe Hillary Clinton too although I’m undecided on that front] but my head is reeling from post-holiday blues, recent break-ups, and too much gin&tonic so I’m going to make a list of the best Things about breaking up [because I feel like a vindictive little bitch]. AIGHT:

1. Paul Anka’s “Breaking Up is Hard to Do“

I’m sorry? This song makes me want to break up every day just so I have an excuse to listen to it.

2. High Fidelity

The movie, not the book [I’m a plebian on this count, although I have no doubt that Nick Hornby’s writing is equally brilliant.] I try to watch this every time I get my heart broken. It helps if you have a doofy brother who can act as a parallel to Jack Black’s Barry. Additionally, one cannot surpass the epic opening line: “Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands, literally thousands of songs about heartbreak, rejection, pain, misery and loss. Did I listen to pop music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to pop music?” TOO FUCKIN’ TRUE, ROB GORDON.

3. The Magnetic Fields’ 69 Love Songs

Ok, hear me out on this one: This is a great record for falling in love, truly. However, Stephen Merritt, all-encompassing genius that he is, acknowledges all the shitty parts about love too. I’m reminded of a time in my life during my Worst Break-up Of All Time in which a friend dedicated “I Think I Need a New Heart” to me on a college radio show. Also of note for the broken-hearted: “Love is Like a Bottle of Gin” and “Crazy for You But Not That Crazy” [resonant whether you’ve been on the Crazy side or not. I’ve been on both.]

[Of Note: One thing that is sure to be a highlight of 2008 will be Stephen Merritt’s Valentine’s Day performance at the Somerville Theatre. I now have an extra ticket, if you’d like to accompany me. Har har har.]

4. Girlfriends and Platonic Males

I know that “you were too good for [Redacted] anyway” and “good riddance!” are the oldest cliches in Da Book, but it’s REAL cathartic to have chain-smoking seshes and watch bad rom-coms.

5. Checkin’ out Hotties

Maybe my Missed Connections karma will be resurrected?

I’m only going to say this:

JUNO was amazing. I’d be okay if Michael Cera knocked me up.

Absolutely stellar, and I’m excited to see what Ellen Page is going to do in the future.